With Trevor off trying to expand his education (moron), I’m like a single parent just trying to do my best. Apologies for the day-late review of The Walking Dead, blame Trevor. Lord knows I do. Now, let’s talk about “Crossed”.
Welp, this just got awkward….and other things you’ll say when you don’t listen to Rick Grimes.
Or at least, that was the impression I was left with after watching The Walking Dead episode “Crossed”.
We’ve seen this sort of Walking Dead episode every season, setting up and checking in with our characters before the mid-season finale showdown but, it hasn’t been this intense in a long while. There are real emotional stakes going into next week and it truly feels like someone from the group is going to die – an unwelcome feeling after all the work done this season to fine tune their less defined characters. Hell, even Rosita got something to do Sunday night besides be Abraham’s hype man – she can make a fishing net! Before we get ahead ourselves, let’s get into what did happen in “Crossed”.
Shell-shocked, semi-weirdo Father Gabriel is still shell-shocked and pretty weird. We start back at the church, the group (with Noah) ripping the place apart to make weapons for their hostile takeover over of Hell Hospital Grady Memorial. After Daryl reassures Father Gabriel they will only take the holy cross if they need to, homeboy manically occupies himself with scrubbing the blood stains off the floorboards with his fingernail. It’s been made pretty clear that Father Gabriel is having a crappy time adjusting and having an 11-year old essentially tell you to man up can be hard to hear but, how does all that add up to to excavating your way back out into the world that you are obviously ill equipped to handle. Who or what exactly is Father Gabriel running from, still? A lanky tween, a baby, and a woman who is actually capable of saving him in a dangerous situation? Or, is he hiding a bigger secret besides his shame of turning away his congregation? This could be an elaborate way to bring Father Gabriel and Morgan together because if all it takes for Father Gabriel to shy away from bashing in a zombies head is a necklace with a cross, he better turn back to the church ASAP. Which, by the way, is now more unsafe than ever due to Father Gabriel’s elaborate exit strategy.
Which leads to my pressing question, why leave Michonne and take Tyrese? I know Michonne and Carl have the better relationship (and, quite frankly, no one cares what Carl is up to and Michonne, I suppose, doesn’t need the screentime) but Tyrese is arguably the wee baby Judith’s Godfather. Plus, given Tyrese’s new motto, “war…GRUNT…what is it good for?”, of course dude is gonna throw a hulking wrench in the plans.
Admittedly, Rick’s sneak attack plan did sound like it had the most probability for blood but, knowing what we know about this world how doesn’t everyone have: TRUST NO ONE tattooed somewhere? Clearly, Tyrese still believes in the people (dats a mistake) and posits that if they kidnap and trade two of G.M.’s own for Beth and Carol, “everybody goes home”. It’s not a bad idea if they were trained hostage negotiators but the last time they attempted to do this (with Michonne and The Governor) it backfired spectacularly. And in a gunfight too. But we’re talking about life after the Carol and Daryl hour last week, Daryl’s softer side gets the better of him and agrees with Tyrese and when the only guy who can tell you to stand down, tells to you stand down – what’s a dude to do? Tyrese’s plan it is.
No spoilers here, it was foretold everything would inevitably go wrong. They planned for an attack, not a kidnapping – there’s gonna be even more unforeseen shit. Using Noah as bait to lure G.M. out in the open, the first unexpected thing to go down is a second car showing up, guns blazing, temporarily thwarting aforementioned attempted kidnapping. Good thing Sasha is as good of a shot as she says she is, blows out the back tire of the getaway car and the group sets off through a graveyard-maze of zombies, permanently apart of the the asphalt. It was disgusting and pitiful – you felt some sympathy for the zombies rotting away in the sun. Walking Dead keeps injecting beautifully shot scenes of zombies that don’t feel threatening but are still wholly cringeworthy.
While giving an abandoned FEMA trailer an ocular patdown, Daryl gets jumped by some G.M. dick, holding Daryl’s face millimeters away from a snapping, live zombie. Being a badass though, Daryl casually RIPS THE HEAD OF DEAD ZOMBIE AND BASHES THE G.M. DICK OFF OF HIM WITH IT. On a scale of 0 to going full Mike Tyson on someone’s jugular, it was about 8.5.
In the end, the group manage to re-kidnap two of G.M.’s cops, a woman who tries to talk Rick and Co out of the this swap – point blank tells them it won’t work. The other cop, Bob #2, insists that it will work if the group follows his advice – wow, how nice of you Bob! Surely you no have other motives. Wrong. After Sasha’s heartwarming conversation with Tyrese about coping with OG Bob’s death, she unfortunately lets her guard down for the wrong Bob. Trying to do a favor will only leave you knocked out cold, which is how we’re left at the end of “Crossed”. Sasha gets bumrushed and left unconscious by Bob #2, while the rest of the group is presumably getting things ready for the trade-off. Rick’s plan, turned back up plan, might end up becoming the plan after all.
Back at the broken down fire truck, Eugene finally starts to wake up, though I thought at first that his groans and grumbles were walkers. Abraham’s perpetual silent treatment is also coming to a close and the main takeaway from their storyline is hope. No matter what, the group will always find a way to keep on keeping on because…what else are they gonna do? I’ll miss the goal of getting to D.C., I’ve thought The Walking Dead is at its strongest when they’re “on the road”, but there will be other D.C.’s to strive towards.
For now, I’m more concerned with Beth being the sole caretaker of Carol – who was taken off life support in the weirdest assurance of power ever. Even for the assbackwards ways of Grady Memorial. Anyway, Beth has revealed herself be more cold and calculating than her acapella covers of Tom Waits songs would’ve lead you to believe. The scenes with Beth at G.M. were the first time I’d felt like her character clicked and she became a real player in the Walking Dead world. So, with Beth’s newfound confidence, will she be instrumental in what’s to come or will she only get in the way? I can’t picture Beth Fireman carrying Carol outta that hospital….
This is how you set up a literal and emotional explosive mid-season finale, the stakes couldn’t be higher.
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