I was surprised to find that Steven Universe came back. It seems insane schedules are common for Cartoon Network. This show has the craziest hiatuses. Shows up for a full week, disappears for a month. Shows up for another full week, disappears for nearly two months.
Anyway, Steven brings Connie home from one of her fencing lessons on Lion. Connie mentions off hand that she wishes that the could practice outside of those lessons. Steven decides to “bequeatheth” his mother’s sword to Connie so that she actually can practice in between lessons. While they carry it into the house, Connie tells him that her mother will never let her keep it. And then she notices that her mother is home. And Lion disappeared.
She’s incredibly upset that Connie would bring such a thing into the house and confiscates it. Just as she’s about to really lay into a lecture, she gets called back into the hospital over one of her patients. she tosses a warning that there will be a talk when both of her parents are home. When Steven asks if they can convince her to give the sword back, Connie pretty much tells him that the only way they’re getting it back is to steal it.
They ride Lion to the hospital, and this time Steven remembers to give Lion some ice cream bars to stick around. They sneak past the skeleton crew guarding the place and narrowly avoid Connie’s Mom thanks to the reduced lighting. And this is the point where the whole thing turns a bit Silent Hill. (Clever, considering the doctor’s voice actress)
Apparently someone found a couple of the horrifying fusion experiments and thought they were car accident victims. I honestly don’t know how that can happen, since they look like a jumble of torsos, arms and legs, and the accident capable of that would have to look like a highway during the apocalypse. Steven and Connie get caught trying to steal the sword back, things naturally go wrong and they get beset by both of Dr. Maheswaran’s “patients”.
The doctor finally goes back on her decision once Connie points out that not only do these things seem to happen all the time with Steven (which is why she’s been taking sword lessons), but that neither of her parents have noticed that she hadn’t needed new glasses for nearly a year, and that she didn’t tell them for fear of them forbidding her friendship with Steven. Once that happens, Connie and Steven make short work of the shambling horrors. There are promises of an actual discussion.
Final Thoughts:
– “Do you know how many children I see every day in the hospital who cut their faces off with a sword?” None, because actual swords capable of face severing are generally beyond the economic and societal means of children outside of extremely bad parenting?
– Connie’s parents use an abacus to figure out punishment duration? Neeeeeeeerrrrrd!
– I liked how Connie danced around the fact that her eyesight was due to magical backwash. Most kids just wind up with mono, rather than losing their astigmatism.
About Author
