“Hold on a sec, I’m getting a phone call”
–Grinds teeth ruining everyones perfectly nice day–
Sonitus has announced that they have received a multi-million dollar government contract to work on developing a communication device that clips onto a users’ teeth. You thought cellphone radiation was a worry before, now stick one inside your head!
The company is calling this piece of kit the “Molar Mic,” because these people might be genius level smart but they are terrible at naming things. They probably drink and enjoy Cola brand Cola. The plan is for U.S. Air Force service members to be the first to get the device with later branches to possibly follow if the damn thing works.
Sonitus says that using the Molar Mic sounds a like like crunching cereal in your head. I don’t know about you, but when I’m crunching on the Crunch Berries for dinner I can’t hear my girlfriend yelling that I’m in my 30s over her Double-Smoked Salmon with Horseradish Cream.
The company says that audio can be heard right away but that “Over the period of three weeks, your brain adapts and it enhances your ability to process the audio.” The more use use you tooth, the better it sounds. That was a strange sentence to type…
About Author
