Oh man, this episode, guys. It goes everywhere. Little bit of comedy, little bit of drama. Sometimes it chucks both in a blender, and you feel bad about it.
The episode starts off with Russ carpooling with Font to work. Font bought a new car, which has Russ bent out of shape because he almost always is. All of a sudden, Font slams on the brakes.
He flips a U-turn, and explains that he’s certain he just saw a fugitive at the last stop light. It was an insider trader named Barclay Spades driving a Buick Regal. Russ asks Font to drive carefully because the coffee he has in his hands is “hot enough to smelt steel”. You know, the coffee he’s holding in a cup with no lid.
Font tries to beat a train. Russ pleads with him not to. Font eventually slams on the breaks, noting that he would’ve totally made it. Russ’s cup of Terminator-meltingly-hot coffee spills right on his crotch.
Later, Font goes in to see Milt, and tell him what he saw. Milt tells Font that he had to be mistaken. Font tells him that it’s unlikely he is, as he has a talent for spotting people and he never forgets a face. Milt informs him that Barclay Spades is dead, and has been for six months. Font can’t believe it; he’s certain Spades had to have faked his death, but Milt tells him that DNA doesn’t lie.
Font goes back to the squad room to find Russ spraying first aid spray on his nuts. Font brings him up to speed; apparently, Spades jumped off a bridge and there was a Detroit officer that witnessed it. Russ argues that if they reopen the case and catch the guy it would be a huge boon for them.
Font goes to lie to Guziewicz about their reason to go to Detroit. She already figured things out though, and lets them go. She trusts Font’s ability with faces due to an incident involving her sister at a KISS concert.
Russ goes to ask Meredith if the F.B.I. made a mistake in confirming the body as belonging to Spades. She still hates Russ. He realizes that she doesn’t have anything to do, however, because she’s taking inventory and she hates to be idle. She strikes a bargain with him; she’ll go over the report and see if they blew it, and in return he lets her borrow his rolling shitbox of a car to prank her nephew.
In Detroit, Font and Russ go to see the bridge Spades jumped from, with the officer who saw him jump. The officer gushes about the guy. Russ ultimately figures out that he managed to fake his jump by landing on the ledge below.
When they get back, they find out that Meredith found out where the F.B.I. went wrong. Spades filled his house with articles that carried a DNA match to the body he threw into the river. Unfortunately, Meredith got Milt involved in the case.
They divvy up duties. Milt mentions that he’ll check with the treasury department. Holly brings up that the hardest thing to do when you’re a fugitive is to stay away from loved ones. Despite the fact that he was an only child, his parents are deceased, and he never had children, Holly mentions that the file says that he was close to his mother before she died. She brings up the fact that Milt told her that even though Milt and his mother are distant now, he still reminisces about her whenever he eats lasagna. She tells them that the file says Spades’ parents were German immigrants, and that that may be the easiest way to catch him.
They find some hipster butcher shop, and the owner recognizes Spades from the photo they show him. Apparently, Spades had been living under the alias of Oscar. The owner mentions that Spades would likely come in the next day, as that’s when he’d have a fresh batch of panhas (do yourself a favor, don’t Google it) and Spades almost always comes in for that.
I’m moving on to highlights here. There’s an explosion later on in the episode that wouldn’t give Michael Bay even a slight smile, but the ramifications of it carry throughout the episode from that point on. Font gets a piece of shrapnel lodged in the back of his head. It was funny at first, since they do that thing where the person who has something sticking out of his head doesn’t realize it until someone points it out. It quickly becomes less amusing when the injury becomes life threatening as Milt and Russ drive him to the hospital.
They catch Spades because that’s the point of shows like this. Meanwhile, Holly finds out from Font’s wife that Russ is in love with her. Milt does his best to get Russ to talk to her, but in the end their unresolved sexual tension remains… unresolved.
Overall, this episode was pretty damn good. Kal Penn got to walk around with a chunk of glass glued to the back of his head. Russ never learned that a simple plastic lid can keep you from getting second degree burns on your nards. And the hipster butcher had all of his weed confiscated
Final Thoughts:
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Amusing injuries happen to Russ because he is Mayhem.
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The fugitive task force are boat-stealing jerks.
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Spades’ boat was names “Easy Street”. Christ, what an asshole.
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