America’s Next Top Model: “The Guy Who Wows Betsey Johnson”

America's Next Top Model

As America’s Next Top Model starts to wind down and build up to its finale, Samir and I have a lot to say about Friday’s episode, “The Guy Who Wows Betsey Johnson”.

And don’t forget to tune into our Top Model podcast, We Were Rooting For You!, for more America’s Next Top Model. 

Listen to the podcast: Here

Watch it on YouTube: Here

Samir: Here we are for another go-round on the America’s Next Top Model Cycle 21 carousel.  Lenox gets to liking living in the Tyra Suite, but she has to share her “Tyra Treat” (that special something that comes in conjunction with residency in the Tyra Temple), and pick 2 other people now.

Margaux: Lenox extends the kindness of the Tyra Treat to Raelia and Shei, girl power…or something. While they await their treat, Mirjana picks a fight with Keith getting him to drop the face  for 2.5 seconds and admit to camera, “he hates that bitch”. Don’t worry Keith, so does everyone else.

Samir: But remember, this is why Tyra needed to keep her modeltestants’ DNA!  Lenox is just trying to share with her Asiatic sisters!  Weren’t Raelia, Lenox and Shei all linked?   And Keith just keeps making me like him more.  His real feelings about her get shared a LOT this episode, which usually means one thing…

Margaux: They weren’t – it was Raelia, Lenox and Mirjana – but Lenox too, hates dat bitch, and naturally picks Shei. And the “Tyra Treat” ends up being Miss J in a onesie and rollers for a catwalk coaching session.

Samir: And Lenox again shies away from breaking out of her shell, while on the flip side Will has completely shattered his shell, and I am loving it.

Margaux: Lenox claims she can’t twerk because she’s a skinny white girl. Well, from one skinny white girl to another – twerking really isn’t that hard, it’s not math. It’s shaking your ass, just go for it. Lenox’s quitter attitude is kind of a turn off. I’m coming around to Tyra’s early critique that that will ultimately be her downfall.

Samir: Totally, but Raelia makes it look like a science, she’s that good.  And Lenox makes Will’s transformation stand out even more.  He’s looking real fine now.  And why was it necessary for Miss J to make everyone to wear onesies before announcing their next challenge?

Margaux: Because they were all out of “I Love Human Rights” t-shirts?

Anyway, our premonition came true! Well, except the part where we thought the model-testants would be walking in NY Fashion Week. In this weeks challenge, the model hopefuls have to book their own shows, a possible 3 runways for each gender, with designers.

Samir: Yeah, it’s “Style Week.”  Not as impressive, but this is an early version of the go-sees, and true form Lenox is failing.

Margaux: First designer to impress, Betsey Johnson. She only has one spot for the guys, to play a “fireman”which makes for an uncomfortable and awkward audition for the dudes. Denzel thinks he’ll be a lock because of his huge arms but the part ultimately goes to Keith. lol’z on you Denzel.

 

America's Next Top Model

 

Samir: I was a little surprised that Denzel didn’t get that though, as he’s clearly the only place his body would have been appropriate, but who can argue with choosing Keith and his manadonca to hold a fire hose and aim it at the audience?

Margaux: Oh my God Mirjana’s walk looks like she’s strolling at the mall.

Samir: Yeah, and like she can’t buy anything because her kid’s soccer team needs new uniforms.

Margaux: By the last casting of the day, Shei has the lead with 2 of the 3 bookings, to Lenox’s big old zero.

Samir: Shei is clearly in her strength now, every designer loves her.  The Indian designer is kind and hires all of them!  It’s like Lenox and Mirjana are getting a prize for participation, cuz Raelia and Shei are getting everything.

Margaux: It was a pity booking! On the bright side, Shei now knows, no matter what happens in this competition, she can book shows – a lot of them. Therefore, she’s already a working model, which, isn’t that the whole point? And same goes for Will, save for Johnson’s show, he booked every open show for dudes. Unlike Denzel, who books nothing. Serves ya right, big old dick in your mouth Denzel.

Samir: Will seems to have become a touch more “masculine” as people are saying here, and it’s working for him- he’s more confident, which reads as masculine, which designers are responding to.  I still think in the real modeling world he could still be himself either way and he’ll be able to get work, so long as his association with this show doesn’t stick.

Margaux: Will wore the men’s clothes really well and incorporated parts of his dancer background into his walk – as I say every week, WERK WILL WERK. And Shei totally kills the runway, she does the smart thing of creating a different character for each designer to finally make herself memorable! No bell needed.

Samir: Damn, she was impressive!  She really absorbed the different styles she was wearing into how she carried herself, and you could distinguish them very easily from one another.  Again, this makes Raelia’s huge mistake stand out when she stops at the middle of the runway and turn around to return back stage.  It literally makes Miss J stand up and scream in frustration.  Too bad because she was good with the Betty Johnson walk.

Margaux: The rebirth of Raelia could’ve been so good if she didn’t screw up her first walk, at least she didn’t Carrie Bradshaw it but it does cost her the prize. Shei gets her very first win! Followed by Will – hey hey!

Samir: They even say that Shei “looks like she belongs there.”  LOL; Will ,on Lenox and Denzel getting the lowest scores: “I feel bad, buuut… not really!”

Margaux: Another hair-centric, photoshoot challenge. The look on Keith’s face when he hears he’s paired with Mirjana for the day – sure this will go super smoothly.

Samir: At least it’s not “avant garde.”  Raelia selling the product as it’s applied to her hair-smart girl.  Shei is trying to pick Denzel up out of the emotional dumps, by being sweet and communicative, which makes Mirjana jealous and unpleasant, (what’s new?) and Denzel looks like he’s half dead.

Margaux: Mirjana is quite the succubus, she totally casts her Grumpy Cat cloud over Denzel and Shei’s shoot – pretty sure Mirjana’s attitude ruins Denzel’s shoot. Dumb. Ass.  On a bright note, my favorite pairing in the photoshoot is Raelia and Will – Ebony and Ivory. Yet, having a hard time finding the harmony and right “effortless” position for this. Let’s hope the photo just turns out good.

READ:  America's Next Top Model: Cycle 22, "The Guys and Girls Make It in Hollywood"

Samir: Yu Tsai, and the frustration with Raelia not being able to hold her own in the lifts, makes it seem like it isn’t working.  But it’s kind of crazy that the guys have to lift the girls for this shoot.  Mirjana is the worst by far!  She starts ANOTHER fight, this time on set!

Margaux: Because eighteen year olds don’t know what being “professional” means. It’s so hard to watch, especially since Keith tries to make the best of it right before they go to set, “Mirjana has her ratchet moments”. Ummm, the tantrum she throws makes Yu Tsai look rational.

Samir: Best line, the photographer tells Keith he’s doing great, to which Mirjana replies: “So what’s my problem?”  To which photog replies: “Jesus F*** EVERYTHING, the whole package!”  Girl, he just said that to you in front of EVERYBODY, so you know it’s true.

Margaux: Will, who accidentally incurs her wrath by merely suggesting that perhaps Mirjana is equally at fault for Keith not being able to hold her up to her standard, puts it aptly: “I could give two shits about Mirjana”. Us too honey.

Samir: Poor Lenox, my premonition is coming true.  Her inability to “not move” once they’ve put her in place for her shot is further testing Yu Tsai’s audibly overtaxed vocal cords.  I did not want this day to come, but she may have to move her floral nightgowns out of the Tyra suite tonight.

Margaux: All will be revealed at panel…

Samir: I just realized the agency the winner gets a contract with is “NEXT”?  Does that seem bizarrely honest and apropos of Tyra?  They’re going to hear that a lot in their lives after this show.

Margaux: Oh the irony of ANTM – it kills me.

Tyra, Mirjana isn’t even modeling H 2 B – head to boobs – girls eye looks hella wonky. Good thing Keith pulls off the photo and gets a pretty good score from the judges.

Samir: Because this shoot was all about the hair, and apparently having some made Mirjana even more obviously less of a model than her partner, who had none.

Margaux: Oaf, I wish the judges would drop the whole “Denzel should of lost 15 lbs by now” nonsense. How would that even be physically possible in the span of time they have?! The resulting critique of Denzel and Shei’s picture is basically deemed the one of the worst of the bunch, Denzel looks super stiff in it. Especially when it’s followed up by Raelia and Will’s picture, which is FIERCE! Rebirth of Raelia indeed.

Samir: Yeah, theirs is the star of the shoot, Tyra AND Miss J give him a ten, and Tyra gives Rae-Rae a 10 too <3<3<3.

But then we get to Lenox and adam.  But ya know, they rightfully talk trash about Lenox not letting loose, but I do not understand the criticism of her photograph.  It seemed like the best one of the girls to me, she gave good face & her hair looked amazing, which was the point of the shoot, wasn’t it?

Margaux: I’m not getting the “ice skater” vibe Kelly claims. Not like we ever agree with Kelly anyway…

Will F-I-N-A-L-L-Y gets Best Photo of the Week – pack it up Lenox. As a matter of fact, Lenox’s fall from the Tyra Suite is so hard, she ends up in the bottom two – again, with Denzel. Obviously, Lenox barely makes the cut back into the Top Model house, leaving Denzel’s beard weave out in the cold.

 

America's Next Top Model

 

Samir: Good thing he’s got all that muscle to keep him warm but he can still comeback… a “possibility” that will soon be obliterated by a soul food feast of Tyra’s favorite buffet- ribs, cornbread, mac’n’cheese, and my mouth waters just looking at everyone pigs out on it.

Margaux: It’s such a weird way to segue to bring out the model’s from the “comeback” cycle, and even the “soul” and “Seoul” connection is shaky as best. Oh yeah, and our third premonition came true too – the models are going abroad now, along with one of the comeback kids.  Tyra whittles down the bunch by revealing the Top Girl and Top Guy of the social media scores.

Samir: Seoul, the home of the 1988 Summer Olympics, and in the same country that will host the next Winter Olympics in 2018.  I hope Tyra arranges a visit with figure skating sensation Kim Yuna.

And since this is based on social media scores, and Denzel was just eliminated with a low social media score, we already know he’s out.  But I’m surprised, and yet not surprised, that Matthew gets the lowest social media score of all.  I guess that actually bodes well for his actual career, because the social media ANTM voters, as evidenced by their video judgings, are a, shall we say, mixed lot.

Margaux: It was surprising that Ben, who I’ve all but completely forgotten about, won the Top Guy spot – facing off against the unsurprising Top Girl pick – Chantelle. But of course, the winner who gets the Golden Ticket to Seoul will be unveiled next week. Damn you Tyra!

Samir: It’s like a microcosm of that week in every cycle when we are just about to get to the final episode, but then Tyra shows us a behind-the-scenes clip show instead.  I guess it’s nice that Ben will at least get to see South Korea for a couple of days.

Margaux: Haha, exactly! I was really hoping we’d see more than 2-3 rushed photos of the Comeback Cycle but it just pushed through a rapid fire montage of crap.

More to the point, “The Guy Who Wows Betsey Johnson” was a stronger episode America’s Next Top Model because we basically called it all last week and it was satisfying to watch. 5 stars.

Samir: 5 stars it is.  I like what waits for us in next week’s challenge, which appears to have them wearing some really strange fringed leather monstrosities that look more Folsom Street Fair than high fashion.

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M. Poupard

Margaux Poupard is an award-winning comedy screenwriter, freelance copywriter, and accomplished producer.

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