Nintendo Switch Online has finally launched and it feels, well, pretty light. The main thing of interest for most people will be the retro games that are offered but those, again, are pretty slim pickings on launch day. Sure, it’s only $3.99 a month for the 20 NES games available, but most are pretty garbage.
Look, I’m a huge NES fan and have a massive collection that will pay for my kids college in the future, but the games offered here aren’t the cream of the crop from Nintendo. There are a number of “black box” titles which means games that launched on the NES.
This means we you are getting a number of sports titles that are pretty much unplayable in 2018. Soccer is good for some laughs, Tennis will give a few minutes of slow action, Baseball makes the sport seem even more boring than it is, and Pro Wrestling is technically a video game.
The only sports game that’s any lasting fun is Tecmo Bowl which still holds up today in the fun department. Ice Hockey is one close to my heart but isn’t all that great without some friends and beers. It’s best remembered for letting two teams of fat Mario’s play against each other.
The original Mario Bros is here, the non-Super version which is a fun look at at the early days of Nintendo but not much fun for more than five or so minutes. And that’s just the thing here, you aren’t getting many games that you’ll be able to really sink your teeth in.
Zelda and Super Mario Bros. 3 are as amazing as ever, so if you don’t have either then snagging a month pass is totally worth it just to play through both of those titles. Ghost N’Goblins is the only really oddity in the bunch as it’s as brutal today as it was a dozen plus years ago.
Of the entire 20 games available right now I can only pick out 5 that still hold up and provide a few hours of good fun. There are just too many “black box” games here that are only slightly more advanced than the Atari 2600 offerings that were around in the 70’s.
Dr. Mario is a lovely puzzle game but not seeing Tetris on the list is really weird. I appreciate seeing Yoshi on here too as most people passed this one up back in the day, but it does mean you get two puzzle games that are pretty similar. Thankfully, Gradius is here and River City Ransom should keep some people messing about, but the offerings are just so weird.
There are no RPG’s on offer and while Konami and Capcom toss a game each, their big series like Mega Man and Castlevania aren’t anywhere to be seen. It’s also weird having every Mario game except Super Mario Bros. 2. I know more games will be added but it just seems like a weak and weird start.
But the worst thing about this whole thing is the grid layout that Nintendo unleashed on the world. The games are represented by their box art but the art isn’t lined up. Some boxes are bigger than others which means nothing snaps to a grid. It’s enough to drive me, and I’m sure a lot of people, up the wall.
Thankfully you get the ability to play some couch co-op but the controls are pretty terrible. Zelda is unplayable with the JoyCon controllers because it uses a grid system and the analog joystick will not cut it. Nintendo has on offer some NES controllers for $60 that are going to be required to get the most out of the games. But at that price you’re better just buying an old NES!
Why is it that no console making company today makes a controller with a good D-pad? Not even Nintendo seems to know how to create one. It’s like someone lost the design files or something. In handhed mode things are better but you aren’t going to be loving these games as much as you once did because of the controls.
The online works fine when you have a friend to play with, but this is Nintendo so we will see how stable and lag-free things will be once servers start filling up with more users. I just don’t know. It’s hard for me to recommend the online service right now for the NES offerings alone.
What’s worse is that you’ll have to buy the service to play games, some of which that you’ve already been playing online for nearly a year. Mario Tennis Aces, Splatoon 2, and Mario Kart 8 Deluxe will lose their free online which makes no sense. Look, I get new games requiring the service but retroactively taking away online from users who have purchased games is just stupid.
Thanks for playing our great games! Now buy our online subscription if you want to keep playing. Forcing Splatoon 2 players, as its mostly an online only game, to now pay to play it really sucks.
Nintendo is a company supported by kids and families, so I expect a lot of annoyed parents now having to pay more to let their kids play games online that were free before. What’s worse is that Fortnite won’t need the subscription to play so who knows what games will need it down the road.
If this online subscription launched alongside the Nintendo Switch I would be totally fine with it and the price. I’m sure a few months down the road when more free games get added things will balance out as there is a lot of promise, but on launch it just feels kinda “meh”.
Now, if you’ll excuse me I’m going to play Splatoon 2 before all those kids find their parents credit cards.
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